{"id":21357,"date":"2020-04-16T20:49:32","date_gmt":"2020-04-16T18:49:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cantonuovo.org\/the-lord-has-tended-to-my-wounds-just-like-a-father\/"},"modified":"2020-04-16T20:49:32","modified_gmt":"2020-04-16T18:49:32","slug":"the-lord-has-tended-to-my-wounds-just-like-a-father","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cantonuovo.org\/en\/the-lord-has-tended-to-my-wounds-just-like-a-father\/","title":{"rendered":"The Lord has tended to my wounds, just like a father."},"content":{"rendered":"

Jesus, my sure refuge<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

The Lord has healed my wounds, just like a father.<\/i><\/span><\/h4>\n

I grew up in a family with serious marital problems. <\/span>My father had no love for my mother and there was always an atmosphere of fear and psychological abuse at home. From a very young age, I felt responsible for everything \u2013 for my brothers and sisters, and for <\/span>my mother, whom I always saw as submissive and suffering.<\/span><\/p>\n

I remember always thinking, \u201cWhen I grow up, I won\u2019t be like that; I\u2019ll have a man who loves me, a happy and <\/span>peaceful family.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t form a secure attachment with my parents; <\/span>I was always looking after them, and I always felt I had to earn the love of others, which I needed so much.<\/span><\/p>\n

I married my long-term boyfriend; we grew up together, had two children, and when another woman came along and he told me he no longer felt anything for me, it was absolutely devastating. I was working nights, with two young children, and I even had thoughts of ending it all; I felt completely unprotected, but I carried on, and this burden of pain and hurt remains buried deep inside me. <\/span><\/p>\n

Then I met a man and began a secret affair with him, hurting many people and myself in the process. After a few years of this awful life, he left his wife, and I saw a glimmer of hope for redemption in my life. I threw myself into this relationship with everything I had: I wanted to rebuild a family with my children and my man. <\/span><\/p>\n

Late in my pregnancy, I lost the baby I was expecting, another terrible blow that I felt was my fault, as if I didn\u2019t deserve anything. Then life seemed to smile on me again; I found the courage, against the doctors\u2019 advice, to have another pregnancy. Our daughter was born and a few years later we had a civil wedding.<\/span><\/p>\n

My wounds and my pain lay dormant, locked away deep in my heart.<\/span><\/p>\n

But at 50, my life comes to a sudden halt: I discover I have a mass and other complications. I stop working; the road to diagnosis is long and fraught with complications; there are fears it might be a nasty form of cancer; I experience the fear of dying in a very real way. The fear takes my breath away; sometimes I think of God but I tell myself, \u2018Why on earth would He save me of all people?\u2019 <\/i><\/span><\/p>\n

Nevertheless, I carried on in my own way, relying solely on my own strength.<\/span><\/p>\n

During this time, I discovered by chance that my husband was cheating on me. It all came crashing down on me, along with issues from the past; it was all tied together by the same thread: you are not worthy of love; my father had never made me feel loved or protected; my first husband had abandoned me; and my second husband was the same story.<\/span><\/p>\n

This was the future that lay before me: anger, pain, hatred, failure, fear; I could no longer believe in anything or anyone. Inner death.<\/span><\/p>\n

I had no resources left; I felt like a handful of confetti thrown out of a window; I had built nothing.<\/span><\/p>\n

I asked the Lord for help because I felt hopeless.<\/span><\/p>\n

When I arrived at Cantonuovo, I knew the Lord only by hearsay. Learning to let Him guide my <\/span>life was difficult\u2026 I heard that Jesus binds up broken hearts, heals our wounds, and forgives our sins, but I too had to learn to forgive my own sins and to love myself. <\/span>This was not easy.<\/span><\/p>\n

I had, and still have, such a thirst for Him, but I have fallen so many times. Yet the Lord has never let me go.<\/span><\/p>\n

Without the brothers and sisters whom the Lord placed by my side, who always prayed for my healing and deliverance, I would never have made it. It is a journey, even though for <\/span>a long time it felt as though I was standing still. <\/span><\/p>\n

The Lord worked on my wounds at the right time for me, like a father; as my trust in Him grew stronger, little by little I was able to learn to place my secure trust in Him, I was able to forgive and I forgave myself, I left my sorrows with Him\u2026.<\/span><\/p>\n

I thank God that I can be here today to bear witness to Him!!!<\/span><\/p>\n

My husband and I, united in the Lord, have built our new home on the Rock; we have celebrated our true marriage with God, together with our community, and we continue to walk this path every day.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thank you, Jesus, for hope and for peace.<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jesus, my sure refuge The Lord has healed my wounds, just like a father. 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